Misheard Things can get you into Trouble

other people's convo with the russian I over heard (cuz I myself am too busy today for the Flirt)


G: Ugh I have cramps today
Russian: You have crabs?
G: omg no!
Russian: maybe you should move a little further away from me...
G: omg I said cramps!
Russian: well still, that's not something you should broadcast.

in the kitchen eating my lunch...

Russian: oh that looks lovely
Me: Are you talking about me or my sandwich?
Russian: *pause*
Me: *raises brow*
Russian: oh I would never call you a "that"
Me: good to know

The Suit Off his Back

at lunch hour I spotted 3 men dressed in only red ties and black boxers holding up signs advertising for the Moores Suit Donation drive. wondering if the Russian saw the same...

Me: Did you see the half naked men on the corner?
Russian: Yes. what was that about?
Me: Moore's suit donations drive. they ask men to give their old suits to their charity then give to men entering the workplace who can't afford to buy new suits.
Russian: that's nice
Me: I expected you to give the suit off your back...
Russian: But then I would come to work naked!
Me: yes...and?
Russian: BEHAVE!

Back from Vacation...

Me: mmm I smell banana
Russian: that would be me, *eats banana* I would share but I'm afraid it's overripe and over bruised
Me: Kinda like you?
Russian: Me?
Me: Yes, you did just come back from holiday in Turkey
Russian: stop that, that's Vegas talk! lol

I've been addicted to you...

Why is this so hard? all I want is someone to be my stength when I am weak.

Malice und vunderland

A part of me I thought was buried long ago has resurfaced, and like any repressed rebellious hellcat it came back kicking and spitting and ready to cause trouble. I hope to have a better handle on her this time, and better skills at deflection when events inevitably go awry. Not sure how long her visit is for but I am certain it will be an interesting adventure.

More Sh*t My Russian Says

NS Carol: so this guy I've been trying to ignore is insisting on taking me to dinner.
Me: He sounds very persistent.
NS Carol: I don't know what he wants
Me: sounds like he wants you, or he wants IT
NS Carol: He wants IT.
Russian: So what's the big deal, don't you come with IT?
Me & NS Carol: LOL!

Yule Blessings

The sun returns! The light returns!
The earth begins to warm once more!
The time of darkness has passed,
and a path of light begins the new day.
Welcome, welcome, the heat of the sun,
blessing us all with its rays.

The Age of Crass

Welcome Ladies, to the age of crass, where the gentle and subtle arts of seduction are regrettably and irretrievably lost. What passes for love notes these days are quickly dashed off and invariably explicit and misspelled text messages. Where proposing a first meeting over coffee has become code for casual sex. Where the hidden messages in a bouquet of flowers, the secret symbolism of posies and roses, is replaced with a blue jean pocketful of coloured and flavoured latex prophylactics whose not-so-subtle message is abundantly clear. An age where a sincere compliment to a woman’s beauty includes the phrase “junk in the trunk”.